Are you sure God answers prayers?

I first came to church as an 8 yo girl on a bus to Trident Baptist Church in N Charleston, SC. The church building has since relocated to Goose Creek, just a few miles down the road from its original location. My home life was not a good place by any stretch of the imagination. Now to be honest it wasn't always bad, but it was rarely good. Get the picture?

Any way, as a little girl and a teenager and admittedly even as an adult I was jealous of those who lived in a Christian home. Not just a "christian" home but good Christian homes. I would spend hours and hours praying and crying and begging God to please give me a Christian home. I would get so angry at him for not giving me what I thought was my right to have.

Look at it logically with me for a minute. Doesn't the Bible command us to "set no wicked thing" before our eyes? Every day and every hour of every day in my home there was constant wickedness in one form or the other. I'm sure some are thinking, "well every home has some sin because all are sinners." I agree with that but I'm not talking about sin, I'm talking about wickedness! If God command me to do something isn't it His obligation to control the things that I can't control to give me the opportunity to obey His commands? In my finite mind I reasoned that this was God's responsibility. He was not answering my prayer the way I thought He should and therefor He didn't love me. In fact for years I thought I was God's idea of a practical joke. That He would purposely put me in circumstances beyond my control so He could have a good laugh at my expense.

I never understood how can God command you to do certain things or not do them and then put you in a place to where you couldn't follow His word! For years this boggled my mind. As I grew older and daily life got a little easier because I moved out of my parents home, I began to realize a truth that has never occurred to me before. In reference to the before mentioned command, " I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes," Psalm 101:3a when I had to witness wicked things and I had no control over whether or not they were put before my eyes, then that sin was put to my charge if in my heart I was abhorring and rejecting it. Now if I was inwardly enjoying it, then it was my sin to confess but that's another topic all together.

I never did realize until my late 20's that I had a Christian home. No I'm not saying that my illustration from before was some psychotic delusion! What I am saying is that I am my home. Home is the people not the building. Home is not determined by birthright or DNA or location. It is determined by a group or even single person of like minded faith and ideals. You see I had that all along and didn't even realize it. I keep looking for God to do this supernatural thing without, all the while restraining Him from doing a supernatural thing from within.

Now I have a Christian home (that is when I remember to behave in a Christian manner) from without and within. You see, God answered my prayers when I got saved. God answered my prayers when Jesus Christ became my brother and the two of us formed a Christian family.

And when I feel that God is not answering my prayers the way and in the time that I think He should, before I get frustrated or angry or even disappointed that God hasn't given me want I think is "my right" to have, I need to take some time to examine if He already has before I start complaining that He hasn't.

The next time you think that God hasn't answered your prayer, think first of this: Has He answered it and I just didn't listen.